The Opening Of the Eyes

This I will state. Let the gods forsake me. Let all persecutions assail me. Still I will give my life for the sake of the Law…


Here I will make a great vow. Though I might be offered the rulership of Japan if I would only abandon the Lotus Sutra, accept the teachings of the Meditation Sutra, and look forward to rebirth in the Pure Land, though I might be told that my father and mother will have their heads cut off if I do not recite the Nembutsu – whatever obstacles I might encounter, so long as persons of wisdom do not prove my teachings to be false. I will never yield! All other troubles are no more to me than dust before the wind. 


I will be the pillar of Japan. I will be the eyes of Japan. I will be the great ship of Japan. This is my vow, and I will never forsake it! 

The Opening of the Eyes WND 1

I Decided to Boycott CNN Forever

Two weeks ago I wrote a blog post about Kathy Griffin, Anderson Cooper and CNN. I started a lawsuit file because of the issues surrounding their use of a video camera in Spc 64 and the physical pain I was feeling associated with their use of the camera. I did not give anyone my permission to use my name or image in association with a video camera, with one single exception: Jim Comey. 

I think what happened is Jim tried to take the video camera from Anderson Cooper to film himself. Anderson Cooper always had a gun in his left hand [as a threat] that I felt behind my left shoulder blade as one would feel a knot in the muscle. He never dropped the gun and Jim mentioned something to me about the last night I spent at the house in Oxnard. He said he was there. 

Jim mentioned something to me about how after that night Patrice Failor had threatened him with his father-in-law, James Whitey Bulger, an Irish-American former organized crime boss of the Winter Hill Gang in Boston, Massachusetts. Failor threatened Jim because she (and many others) didn’t want Jim to go public with the news story of what had happened the last night I spent at the house in Oxnard. Ultimately, I believe Patrice Failor lied to protect Hillary Clinton. 

I checked Anderson Cooper’s Wikipedia page, and I noticed that in 2002, he became CNN’s weekend prime-time anchor. Since 2002, he has hosted CNN’s New Year’s Eve special from Times Square. With this timing, it seemed to me that Hillary Clinton, along with Anderson Cooper, Patrice Failor and CNN decided to use Anderson Cooper as the “media magnet” in order to protect themselves and each other, and to either lie about the truth or bury it. When Hillary Clinton’s time was up at Spc 64 she behaved like the monstrous evil terrorist she really is. 


Imagine Justice

Yesterday I decided to install a new theme for this website. I was having trouble with fonts and switched to a new theme so I could write blog posts with more creative and artistic font styles. In the midst of trying to change background colors, header images and heading styles, I discovered that exactly six years ago yesterday, on August 25th 2011, I wrote my fist blog post for my SundanceKid Online website, titled Up and Running.

The blog post states in part:

I am hoping that by sharing my experiences, thoughts, and feelings about mental illness and schizoaffective disorder, I can reach others who may be experiencing something similar.

This was six years ago and I’ve since changed “schizoaffective disorder” to “schizophrenia.” The “schizoaffective disorder” diagnosis includes both auditory hallucinations and depression (or mania, but not in my case), and although I knew the auditory hallucinations or “voices” I heard in my head were real people, the depression was the only real diagnosis a psychiatrist might have given me. 

The person known as “shithead” (S. McKellar) entered my life a little over fifteen years ago during the spring of 2002 – my last night at the house in Oxnard. Unfortunately he has not left yet. The past fifteen years have been absolutely nothing but vicious, targeted psychological persecution and torment, carried out primarily by the people with whom I was most closely associated with during the past 47 years of my life. I refuse to refer to them as people, and instead I have reached the conclusion that whoever they are, whoever they have become, is a manifestation of an extremely insidious and diabolical evil. 
justice, imagine justice, women, women of color, people of color, happiness

A huge part of the problem was the fact that the majority of the perpetrators indicted as part of both a federal and an international investigation in the U.S. were white males. They were responsible for nearly destroying life on Earth as well as the victimization, abuse, murder and torture of everyone who does not look like them: women, women of color, and people of color were all victimized and subjected to their injustice. 

For years I said to myself, “This isn’t justice. Whatever this is, this isn’t justice.” We needed justice, but we also needed the truth. If we understand the truth of the matter about everything that happened, then moving forward we need to imagine what true justice looks like for ourselves, for our society and for life on Earth. Imagine justice. 



Dinner Tonight with Jim


I Dream Of You

I had a package of boneless chicken breast in the fridge this afternoon, so I decided to prepare all of it for dinner this evening. I had recently bought an Indian chicken dish (chicken tikka masala) from Whole Foods that I liked but I wanted to make something different. I had leftover cumin from a cumin-encrusted salmon dish I made a few days prior, and after a brief Whole Foods recipe search for various chicken dishes, I settled on a flour and cracker-crumb mixture with black sesame seeds, ground mustard, paprika, and a little ginger (but not the beer).


jim, jennifer


I sprinkled white pepper lightly on twoof the chicken breasts and then coated them in the cumin mixture. The remaining two breasts I dipped in a beaten egg mixture and coated with the flour and cracker crumbs. I mixed a coriander (dried cilantro) chutney with Greek yogurt as an Indian condiment with the chicken and the Basmati rice.


I had one of the cumin encrusted pieces of chicken with rice for dinner tonight while Savannah envied every piece. It was delicious. Jim ate his dinner in Spc 64.


Love Is A Midnight Blue 

White Supremacy

Silicon Valley escalates its war on white supremacy

I think this it’s good idea for internet-based companies to exert their influence over evil.

The censorship of hate speech by companies passes constitutional muster, according to First Amendment experts. But they said there is a downside of thrusting corporations into that role.


Silicon Valley firms may be ill-prepared to manage such a large societal role, they added. The companies have limited experience handling these issues. They must answer to shareholders and demonstrate growth in users or profits – weighing in on free speech matters risks alienating large groups of customers across the political spectrum.


These platforms are also so massive – Facebook, for example, counts a third of the world’s population in its monthly user base; GoDaddy hosts and registers 71 million websites – it may actually be impossible for them to enforce their policies consistently.

  • Tracy Jan, Elizabeth Dwoskin, Washington Post, August 16, 2017